That, kiddo, is the brown liquid that awakens adults and gives them energy. Many a sailor would make brew it in weird yet spicy ways so that its bitterness reaches unholy levels and they can stay awake for days straight if it is required of them

You know, if you put it like that it suddenly makes sense how energy drinks don't work on me unless I drink them in ungodly amounts, they actually taste good, as opposed to coffee tasting like ass water.